Many of us hate making New Year’s resolutions. First of all, they’re so cliché. Second, why wait until January to do something you should be doing all year long? And finally, if you’re going to make a promise to yourself, why choose something you’re not likely to accomplish (like abolishing every last drop of sugar from your diet), or something that shouldn’t be rushed (remember how Charlotte in Sex and the City promised herself, “This is the year I meet and marry Mr. Right!”—to disastrous results).
Here are five resolutions that are meaningful, achievable and worthy of your attention year round. Making just one of these a consistent goal can have lasting positive effects on your entire life, from your relationships and career to your mental health. So give them a try, but go easy on yourself (see #4) if you regress now and then.
1. Play more. Kids know instinctively know how to relax in the moment and tap into their fun-loving side. But as we get older and wrestle with grownup responsibilities, we often forget about the therapeutic, life-affirming benefits of laughter and play. Both generate feel-good hormones within our bodies, pull us back to the present, and improve our connections with others (see our story about the positive effects of play). This year, make an effort to get goofy and spend more time enjoying the here and now.
2. Cut it out. From your “to do” list, that is. In her latest book, Thrive, Arianna Huffington writes that sometimes the most efficient way to cross items off your list is simply to cross them off—even if you haven’t actually accomplished them. Will anyone consider you a failure if you rethink your mission to become fluent in French, forget about learning how to make handmade pasta, or give up on trying to organize a decade’s worth of photos into digital albums? Absolutely not. If you’re spending more time agonizing over not achieving these goals than you are enjoying the skills and talents you do possess, you might want to rethink your priorities.
3. Focus. As you remove items from your to-do list, you’ll free yourself up to concentrate on the goals that truly matter to you. Goals that reaffirm your values and life ambitions. Spend your time striving for things that will feed your soul or improve your health and relationships, like getting into shape, writing that book you started long ago, or saying goodbye to a spirit-draining job. Focus on your passions and the rest will fall into place. Bottom line: If it’s really that important to you, do it. Now.
4. Be compassionate. With other people and yourself. When people act out or treat you badly, consider what’s going on under the surface. That driver who just cut you off may have just gotten slammed by her boss. That friend who seemingly dissed you may be upset because she got some tough news this morning. Stop taking things personally and ask what’s going on. And when you’re having an off day of your own, tell yourself it’s OK. You’re human and maybe there’s some emotion you’re subconsciously covering. (Read our story on “Got the Winter Blues?” if you feel you’re in a funk.) So don’t reach for another cookie or a glass of chardonnay. Instead, replace that critical voice in your head with a loving, maternal one and give yourself a break. Be kind to yourself and you’ll find that compassion flows toward everyone around you.
5. Breathe. Singer Alanis Morissette had the word tattooed onto her forearm—a reminder to breathe properly throughout each busy day. And we can all relate to this. As we’re rushing around doing things that seem so important, we often aren’t aware when our breathing becomes shallow, our heart rate increases and we start to feel disconnected from our own body. Over time, these symptoms can evolve into major anxiety and health issues. So, when you’re feeling overwhelmed, pull yourself back with a few deep breaths and slow down. If you have to tattoo the message on your arm, we say go for it.
From all of us at Red Typewriter, have a healthy and loving New Year!
One Response